The Perils Of Internet Dating: Protect Your Heart And Your Wallet

There is a lot to be said for internet dating, being convenient and easily done from your lounge room. However, there has been plenty of press recently concerning Nigerian internet dating scams. Basically, unscrupulous people are targeting lonely women, pretending to be men working or living in Nigeria. These men are encouraging women to hand over their life savings, and getting women to take out loans in incredibly short periods of time.

I don’t know about you, but if some guy started hitting me up for thousands of dollars after only chatting for 10 days I would be sending him on his way. Yep, you read correctly. Some of these guys are actually asking for “loans” after only knowing these women for 10-14 days. Many of the excuses are to pay for plane fares to meet the women, or medical or legal expenses to leave the country.

Would you take out a bank loan for your best friend? Would you mortgage your house or hand over your life savings to a stranger off the street? While these guys may be charming, well they must be saying something right, you cannot forget that you don’t really know who these people are that you are corresponding with.

Online dating scams are always going to be around. There will always be shameless grifters targeting the lonely, both men and women. How do you protect yourself when dating online?

Personal details. Be wary about giving away too many hints about your financial status. If you are mentioning generous ex-husbands, expensive vacations, maids, private schools for the children, nannies, or the fact that you own your own home, you are giving out plenty of clues that you may have access to dollars.

Be cautious about what you are saying. You don’t know the person at the other end, even if you have been lulled into a false sense of security. If you have worked for the last 20 years and always been single, many people wold assume that you might have a bit stashed away for a rainy day. It is no one else’s business whether you own or rent your home. Don’t mention holiday destinations either. Keep some of those details vague.

Requests for money or loans. Anyone who starts mentioning legal fees, medical fees, dying mothers, immigration lawyers, visa fees, or wants the money for the fare to meet you should be immediately treated with mistrust. Seriously, would you hand over a plane fare to a boyfriend that you had only been dating casually? Would you give your credit card to a guy you have just met in a bar? Well, at least in those two instances you actually know what the fellow looks like. If he wants a plane fare to meet with you, suggest you fly over to him. Alternatively, explain you have a bit of a cash flow crisis. Then wait for the emails to stop. This dude has already moved on to the next woman. The genuine guy will be planning his savings with you and mapping out long term strategies. The genuine guy will not be put off when you don’t wire over your life savings. In fact, the genuine guy wouldn’t be asking for your life savings in the first few weeks anyway.

Never hand over what you can’t afford to lose. Okay, so you have fallen for his financial pleas. You don’t believe he is a grifter. Treat this much like gambling, only hand over what you are prepared to lose. What can you afford to give away? Send this amount only. Do not be encouraged to take out a loan to send him money. He will leave and you will be left with the repayments. You will be lonely, broke, and miserable.

Internet dating can be a great and convenient way to meet a new partner. Unfortunately, it can also be a great place for scammers to operate, swindling lonely women looking for love out of their life savings. Protect your heart and your wallet. Do not give away any money that you cannot genuinely afford to lose. Men who start sob stories about needing cash should be treated with suspicion. You are looking for a life partner not a life long financial debt that is gong to cripple you and leave you worse off than before. Here’s fifteen tips for your online date hook-up.